Welcome to my first full recap of Monday Night RAW! This is an experiment of…
Quickie: RAW Christmas
Opening Segment:
- Kane in a Santa hat. YES.
- Randy just gets better and better as a heel. At the same time, I like the bit of dissention between him and The Authority over the past few weeks.
12 Diva “Jingle Bell(e)s” Match:
- LOLWut?
- AJ Lee on commentary. YES.
- Some flashes of good wrestling, here.
- Oh hey, Vickie’s wrestling tonight? Heh, guess not.
- Do-se-do LARIATOOOOOOOOH
- This match wasn’t terrible.
“Inconvenient” Curt Axel (Thanks for the joke, MFX) vs Sin Hunicara:
- Oh man, they really got rid of the old Sin Cara. They even updated his Titantron!
- JBL saying Sin Cara is a bad man because of the mask. I love it.
- Sin Cara lighting during the match. YES.
- “South Pole, south of the border” Horrible. #Racism
Bad Santa Segment:
- Sandow as Bad Santa. YES.
- Definitely a good example of WWE being a live action cartoon.
Side Note: Big Show in a diaper. I’m crying on the inside.
Batista Returns 1/20:
- Why!?
Bad News Barrett Segment:
- YES.
Wyatt Promo:
- “They can’t love you, not like I can” Deep.
- Bryan has the beard to fit in with the Wyatt Family.
Rhodeses/Bryan vs Wyatt Family:
- The Rhodes’ music isn’t so terrible after all. Maybe.
- YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES!
- The Wyatts still have one of my favorite entrances ever.
- Some great action here, from some great wrestlers. It’s WRESTLING, on a WRESTLING show. Oh my gosh.
- This match has had like 3 or 4 commerical breaks. I LOVE LONG MATCHES WITH WORKRATE #Smark
Good Santa Segment:
- Mark Henry as Good Santa. YES.
Bad News Barrett Segment 2:
- YES. YES.
Christmas Carol Contest:
- Xavier Woods is a great singer. Shut up, R-Truth!
- Run 3MB with the “Jingle Bells” screecher.
- Santino Marella and (WMS regular) The Rizz’s favorite wrestler The Great Khali
- “Fa la la la la, fa la la la la”
Christmas Present on a Pole – Fandango vs Dolph Ziggler:
- Poor, poor Dolph. He’s a former World champion, for crying out loud!
- YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO REVEAL THE PRESENT BEFORE OPENING! #XMasRage
- Decent little match.
- FAHHHN…DAHHHN…GOOOOOOOOOOO
Side Note: Not one but two trios matches…what is this, CHIKARA? #IAmWWE #IAmCHIKARA
Primetime Players vs Usos:
- “DAAANNNNG USO CRAZY” – Best. Sign. Ever.
- “This is Austin” and “Houston Sucks” means it’s one of THOSE crowds.
Good Santa (Mark Henry) vs Bad Santa (Damien Sandow):
- I like the themes for these guys, especially Bad Santa. I hope they put these on iTunes.
- This match. Oh my gosh. 5 stars!
CM Punk/Big E Langston/John Cena Promo:
- CM Punk with mic GOLD as always. YES.
- Big E Langston. YES.
- John Cena. YES.
Side Note: Jeff Dunham on Tribute to the Troops. YES.
Real Americans vs Matadores:
- “Santa is an illegal immigrant” YES.
- I don’t care what anyone says, I love Cesaro in this almost ironic role with the Real Americans.
- Swing…swing…swing…swing…swing…swing…swing…swing…swing…YES.
- That move where one Matador stayed on the turnbuckle, and went into a headscissors was awesome. #Ole
“Cool Dude” Kofi Kingston vs “Chef” Ryback:
- SOS…They hear me jobbin’…
- Those tights, though.
- GOOOOLDBERRRG…GOOOLDBERRRG…
- Well, this match happened. Decent.
Bad News Barrett Segment 3:
- YES. YES. YES.
Side Note: THAT BIG SHOW IN DIAPER AGAIN. NO. NO. NO.
Punk/Langston/Cena vs Shield:
- Great match approaching.
- “Let’s go Cena…Cena sucks” EVERY TIME.
- Seriously great wrestling. World. WRESTLING. ENTERTAINMENT. YES!
- Show ends with each face’s music playing. Possibly worth noting that Big E’s was the last played. YES.
Overall:
- Good stuff for a holiday show. YES.